Free-IQTest.net - Free IQ Test

So I finished Snow Flower and the Secret Fan, which -- if you remember my last post -- was quite an accomplishment after it about made me sick 20 pages in.  However, I was very glad I was able to finish it.  I won't deny that it was a very girly book, but it was well written and had an interesting story.  It was sad, though, so don't go running to read it if you're wanting a light hearted summer book.

In other news, I was devestated that Lauren went home on SYTYCD.  I'm so ready for Lacey to go -- that cocky chic needs to get booted.  But overall I'm happy with the final 4...it should be a GREAT finale tomorrow night.  And we'll finally get what we want: Sabra and Danny dancing together!! :-) 

So tomorrow I'm meeting with the head of community affairs about getting our company involved with IUDM.  My friend Carol approached me with getting them involved, and I'm so nervous about the meeting.  I spent some time creating my own overview forms that will hopefully persuade the people in charge, and I'm sort of banking on the fact that you can't really turn such an amazing cause down,...but I'm terrified that I'll screw it up or won't sound professional enough or won't be educated enough and will screw this opportunity up.  And it would be amazing for both IUDM and my company.  Repeat it with me: Don't screw up tomorrow!

I have never in my life almost thrown up from reading a book -- until tonight.

We're supposed to read Snow Flower and the Secret Fan for my book club.  I'm like 23 pages into the book when they go into the most graphic description of foot binding I have ever seen. 

Look, I knew intellectually that foot binding was an unpleasant process.  In theory I knew that.  But then they went into bones breaking and all the smells, etc and the next thing I know I have that dizzy/swimming feeling and I'm lying down in the bathroom talking myself out of losing my dinner.

I think I reached the end of the foot binding part, but I really don't know how I'm going to pick that book up again.

If I finish it I might have a better review, but all I can say right now is pick up the goriest horror novel you can find--it'll be easier on your stomach.

Today we went to Taste of Soulard for the pre-Mardi Gras festivities.  For $20.00 you got 7 tickets to be used at a variety of different establishments.  We had to-die for crab cakes, an andoulle and crawfish stuffed pasta shell, blackend shrimp over rice, blackend chicken cajun pizza, red beans and rice, hurricanes, and apple and whiskey sauced bread pudding.  Everything (except the red beans, which were too soupy for our taste) was amazing.  Especially the crab cakes and the bread pudding.  The bread pudding we probably could have had 4 servings of, it was so good. 

Anyways, so we're walking toward one of the restaurants and we meet up with just a random man.  He tells us that Johnny's red beans and rice are fantastic and that we should really try Joannie's pizza.  He was very nice, but we didn't want a buddy for the entire day, so we said thanks for the advice and went in another direction.  After a little while, we decided that the pizza did sound pretty damn good, so we headed over to their tent.  We go inside and random man is there.  He says hello and wants to know our name.  THEN he starts telling us how he spent a bunch of time in Alaska and how there are more bear killings there than anywhere else...and that most of those killed are women.  And then he attempts to delicately explain to us WHY it's mostly women that get killed.  And I'm sitting there wondering how we went from eating pizza to hearing about why we should never go camping in Alaska while we're menstrating!  Seriously, one of the weirder moments my life. 

After that, we start looking for the SoCo trailer that we heard was going to be at Taste of Soulard.  We pass Clemintine's (whose fried oyster po' boy was not enticing us at all) and a man comes out saying "ladies, you have to come into this bar."  Um...why?  He looks totally freaked out and tells us that his friends just got there and apparently the place is a gay bar -- something he was not aware of when he arrived.  We laugh and ask if they've been getting hit on..."we're getting eyed."  We told him sorry and wished him luck and walked on.

Oh, and as for the SoCo trailer...turns out that they use one map for the entire month of mardi gras, so not everything on the map is present.  Damn.  So we went to Molly's for "hurricanes" which I swear didn't have anything alcoholc in them at all -- and yet still made me feel like I was drinking red jungle juice at a frat party.

But it was totally a good time -- so much good food!!

The anatomy of a Super Bowl species
By Andrew Shaffer  | Indiana Daily Student | Tuesday, January 23, 2007

A ninth Cincinnati Bengals player was arrested within nine months, Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick was caught carrying a suspicious water bottle and legendary head coach Bill Parcells announced that he's retiring from coaching.

But, who the hell cares?

The Indianapolis Colts and Chicago Bears will face off in Super Bowl XLI, and finally Bloomington is going bowling -- Super Bowling, that is.

Of course, there is only one town on Earth that will serve the front lines for this February feud. If Chicago and Indianapolis were the respective capitals of this gridiron clash, only one region will be the bedrock of bedlam. "What town?" you ask.

Naperville? Noperville. Lafayette? Not yet. Kokomo? Koko No. South Bend? Get bent -- Fighting Irish fans don't even know the NFL exists. So, then where?

Welcome to Bloomington, Ind., a Midwest melting pot that blurs the lines of professional football allegiance. Welcome to the jungle that inhabits primarily two kinds of football fan: DaBearus butkus and Coltus domis. For the next two weeks, Bloomington will serve as No Man's Land to Every Man's fantasy. Where there was once "bleeding Kansas" in middle America, soon we will come to terms with "bleeding Bloomington."

In 1854, the Kansas-Nebraska Act introduced "popular sovereignty," the idea that any state established in America can allow its citizens to democratically decide whether they would be pro- or anti-slavery. Now, in 2007, popular sovereignty has forsaken fans on either side of the Indiana-Illinois border, with Bloomington established as the new Mason-Dixon Line.

Make no mistake about it, my fellow Hoosiers -- for the next two weeks we will be a segregated city. And mark my words: A house divided half-Bear and half-Colt fan cannot stand. OK, that might have been Lincoln's language, but, before you makeshift a musket and ring out a rally cry, you should get to know both species that stand in arms against each other.

DaBearus butkus: The Chicago Bears' fans comprise a remarkable genus. Their native tongues are straightforward, as nearly every sentence begins and ends in two words: "Da Bears." While strong in their convictions, DaBearus butkus are weak in its geography. It famously holds the belief that the city of Chicago is nearly 200 miles around in diameter, just so long as its hometown is considered "Chicago" to anyone who asks. DaBearus butkuses are polytheistic people who believe in two gods: Mike Ditka and Dick Butkus. Though they beam with pride in their newest leader, Rex "Sexy Rexy" Grossman, DaBearus butkus is a brutal, bandwagon bunch that is ready to jump at Rexy's jugular if need be.

Coltus domis: The Indianapolis Colts' fans are the dominant beasts in Bloomington. These normally docile diehards have turned diabolical since tasting the Boston blood of quarterback Tom Brady. As monotheists, the Coltus domis wakes up every morning with a prayer to its savior, Peyton Manning, and also perform a small sacrifice to Robert Irsay,the man who brought professional football to Indiana. No defense? "No problem," says the Coltus domis, who naively relies on dome turf and a diluted defense to defeat its enemies. The Coltus domis has a rare offspring of students who reside in Indianapolis, but preach Butkus. These "bi-fanuals" have never been fully embraced by either species in either state.

Fellow readers, this is a historic time that we are living in. Two weeks from now, the Super Bowl will create mayhem in the Midwest as both species are already starting to sharpen their claws. This game will decide bragging rights for decades to come, and if it all concludes in one controversial call, then may Butkus, Ditka and Manning have mercy on us all.

So, praise football and pass the ammunition, because come Super Bowl Sunday, there will be bedlam in Bloomington.

We're planning the next few seasons, but we were on hold as to what to do with two of our stores.  They were going to be closed, but due to leases, etc, they are now going to remain open.  For the spring season.  Which starts in two weeks. 

Which leads us to our story...

I'm working on a project with my boss, and we're about to go over my part of the project when she holds up a finger and says "hold on, I'm going to call {swim planner} first."  So I figure she has a planning question to ask him and tune her out.  But then I hear her adopt a lower voice.  She's saying:

"Hello.  This is Debbie from {store name}.  We just found out that we're staying open and I wanted to talk to you about our swim assortment.  What we really need are some high-price merchandise.  We're thinking some $200 tankinis. [pause].  No, we're really looking for some high priced tankini's - like in the $200 range.  [pause]  Well, how about some $200 cover ups.  [pause].  Really?  Well, what about flip flops? [pause] Alright, well, I'll call back in a week to see what you've been able to get us.  Thanks; bye!"

I am by this point almost crying as I'm trying to keep my laughter down.  My boss tells me that he got pretty angry on the phone...("well the assortment is pretty much set."  "Yeah, we don't offer that kind of merchandise"  "Ma'm, we don't even CARRY flip flops!") meanwhile -- because his desk is two doors down from ours -- we can hear his post-call reaction.

I look at her and ask "Didn't he see your name pop up on his phone?"  "Nope, I dialed out of the building to call him!"

So she waits about 5 minutes, goes into his office and says: "Have you gotten a phone call from Debbie at {store name}?"  The swim planner increadulously says "YES!! That woman is WHACK!"  My boss replies, "Yeah, she left me a message asking me about really expensive prom and better dresses.  I just didn't know what to tell her...it was the weirdest thing ever!"   He responds, "No kidding; she was wanting $200 tankinis!  We don't even sell those!"  My boss: "Really?  Did she ask about flip-flops, too?"  Swim Planner (not catching on): "Yeah!"

[pause]

"....yeah, that was definately me."

Needless to say, he wasn't very happy about getting "Punked" (as he put it) and is out for revenge.  The scary thing is, he's decided that I was in on the prank, too!  Guess I'll have to watch my back from now on.

Hell, at the very least, we won't have a repeat of 2 years ago :-)  But I have to admit, after hearing about how badly we're going to be creamed by the Tigers, it's very, very, very awesome to have won the first game!  Go Redbirds!

Alright, so funny story of the month:
Lauren and I have been going to dinner every Tuesday now that she's in STL for her first project.  We've been going fun, relatively nice places and - because we're going around 7:30 - we've been making reservations.  This week, Lauren felt like Mexican and suggested ZuZu.  She heard it was good, though neither of us had been before.  So, like we always do, she offers to make reservations.  She emails me a few hours later saying the woman was pretty rude in telling her that they didn't take reservations.  Lauren couldn't really figure out why she had been so odd on the phone...until we showed up to ZuZus that night to find it a fast food restaurant.  Imagine calling up Qdoba inquiring about reservations!  *headdesk*

I've been spending most of my free time reading lately.  In the last month, 've read Bernard Cornwell's The Last Kingdom, Jasper Fforde's The Eyre Affiar and Lost in a Good Book, Mary Doria Russell's The Sparrow, and Dave King's The Ha-Ha.  The Last Kingdom and The Sparrow were by far the best, but Fforde's books are just so damn much fun!  Anyways, I'm running out of things to read again and should probably hit Borders sometime soon. 

Homecoming is next weekend, and I got to take a half day on Friday to get back to Bloomington at a decent hour!!  I'm so excited to see everyone again after almost 6 months.

Once again, though: GO CARDS!

LOST = Love.

That's all for now :)

For work, we did a community service project: we ran a field day at Bush AAA (a middle school STL public school district)

It was a beautiful day - perfect for a field day - and we all had a lot of fun.  I also got dismissed from work at 1:30 this afternoon-- can't get much better than that!!

BUT the funniest thing that happened today was a small little girl - but feisty as hell, was involved in a water fight.  Some boy threw water at her perfectly straightened hair.  She started screaming: immediately, the wet part of her hair started tightly curling.  So she had half a head of straight hair, and half a head of very curly hair.  She was spectacularly pissed.  She went after the boys with a vengance.  And I felt bad for the girl; I mean, that really sucks.  HOWEVER, she wouldn't wet down her entire head: that way she would have had one hairstyle.  But she wanted the straight hair to stay straight.  *sigh* so funny.

AND THEN!!  She's shrieking and yelling at her teammates to hurry up because she wants to win.  She was the smallest girl in the school, but DAMN was she feisty.

She made my day.

I participated in the dizzy bat race.  I forgot how amazingly dizzy that makes you.  I was barely able to run back to my teammates and wound up diving on the ground so that everything would stop spinning.

All in all, a very nice way to spend a half day of work!