What were some of the hiccups...
Other people have come across when opening (or re-opening) their relationships?

When G and I first started dating we were steadfastly "open" then over time evolved into swinging "together-only" for 2 1/2 years, but that didn't fill my need for the type of partners I'm attracted to as leather lesbian and trans-gen F-M tend not to be attracted to men... Beyond even that though, I'm also at a place in my life where I'm wanting solo playtime.

To scratch that itch we tested out "hall passes", which were fine, but don't fill my community or deeper needs so we are now in the bigging stages of trying to open fully again.

Yes, it's pretty clear, I am looking to open us so I can connect with the lesbian community and find a place there. G is more into the sex for the sake of sex. Neither of these is bad, but it's nice to know that he can get his play one place and I can get my community elsewhere. Obviously our communication has been ongoing and extensive.... Given our mix of worlds, any advice for pitfalls to watch out for?

Shae

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Looking to talk to someone
Hi,
I am a 26 year old graduate student at USC film school who is doing her thesis documentary on jealousy. Within this, I am looking at polyamorous relationships. In particular, I am looking at the rules that couples set before becoming polyamorous, as well as the effects it has on the relationship.

I am currently doing research and am looking for people within the area to talk to about their experiences with me off camera.

I want to state that I am not looking at this subject to be exploitative. I am hoping to explore human nature, in particular why we feel we NEED to have only one couple when few other mammals attach themselves to one partner.

If anyone is interested in speaking to me- either via email, phone or in person, whatever makes you comfortable-- I would greatly appreciate it. Please just respond to this and I'll get back to you.


Thanks so much!

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Odd things and observations.
My rant today is based off of my long term observations in my own lifetime, particularly after coming out as Poly.

Here is the thing. About 90% of the Poly women I meet through all sources are married or a functional equivilent. Of those, about 50% are in a functionally or actually monogamous marriage. And an additional 40% exclude the possibility of a male partner.

Of those in monogamous marriages, nearly all, about 80% of the women are very attracted to me in some signifigant way.

Which has led to some very very frustrating experiences, because I'm not willing to be the back door man. This has also led me to despise those couples who have gender exclusions in their Poly relationships.

Interestingly enough, the vast majority of married (or equivilant) Poly women are attracted to me, while the vast majority of single poly women are not.

If anyone has any insights please feel free to share.

*note* All percentages are guestimates based on personal reflection and as such are subject to a +/- 10% error.

Current Mood: annoyed

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West Coast Polyamory Conference: OCT 5-7:
POLYAMORY CONFERENCE

OCT 5 - 7, 2007

The World Polyamory Association' s 2007 Northern California Conference will be held at Harbin Hot Springs, CA in Middletown, located about two hours from both San Francisco and Sacramento.

If you are interested in Polyamory, Polyfidelity, Open relationships or Responsible Non-monogamy, this is the place to be!

http://www.worldpolyamoryassociation.com
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Say, I don't suppose.....
...there are people still taking any interest in being both poly and in LA, is there? Between 70 and 79 supposedly still active LJ accounts are members of Poly_LA and yet not a whiff of activity in about half a year. As an Angeleno who would like more poly activity in my life, I'd enjoy seeing this community get resurrected.

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Hope to see you this Sunday! Don't miss the last GQR-LA Coffeetalk of the Year!!

THIS SUNDAY! 12-2 PM! GenderQueer Revolution Los
Angeles Chapter's LAST COFFEETALK of the year! No more meetings or
events until 2007!

---

(Please distribute widely. Thank you.)
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Poly cards
We don't really mean this as an ad, but we have gotten requests from many folks to do this, so here goes. We have opened two new web sites, and both are Poly related.

the first one is an E-Greeting site called Alternative Lifestyles Cards. You can send free greeting cards to your poly friends and partners.
http://www.alternativelifestylescards.com

The second is a more formal store, featuring traditional things such as cards, announcements, t-shirts and such, all featuring Poly themes.
http://www.cafepress.com/polycards

We hope that the sites serve the needs of the poly community. If you wish you can always suggest new themes or ideas.

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Hello I have just realized im poly too... Im engaged 23 yrs old from La looking for hot males and females:) prefferably ones that are into witchcraft or blood drinking... Heres my site http://www.mistressoftheundead.com my s/o is not poly only me.

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Hola mi amigos y mi amigas. I just found out about this group and it's late so i'll do the lame ass greatings post. I'm 25 (turning 26 this august)and i'm straight and have (just in the past yaer) realized i was poly and such. So hello and all that.

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Polyamory? Responsible Non-Monogamy? Open Relationships?
Are you interested in polyamory, Open relationships or responsible non-monogamy? If so, there is a conference happening June 17-19 that you will be very interested in.

This polyamory conference will be happening at Harbin Hot Springs, California, USA,(June 17-19, 2005) just outside of Middleton,(two hours north of San Francisco. This event will be happening in a safe, clothing optional setting in which free sexual expression is permitted within the area designated for the conference.

To register for the conference, or to receive more information,
click on the address below:

http://www.worldpolyamoryassociation.com

If you are interested, the time to act is now, for the current discount price for registration will expire in 2 days!

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Discount Price for West Coast Polyamory COnference Expires in 2 days
This is an updated announcement about the Polyamory conference happening June 17-19. This Conference will be happening at Harbin Hot Springs, approximately 2 hours north of San Francisco. The discount registration price expires in 2 days, and will increase on May 2. So if you are interested in attending, the time to register is NOW.

If you want to register for the conference, or merely to receive more information, click on the link below:


http://www.worldpolyamoryassociation.com


A tentative description of the schedule of presentations is included below:
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YARD SALE in ARCADIA on Saturday 4/30 from 7am-3pm
That's right kids, for one day only - curiouslinda , jajuba , and mizlin are coming together to bring you the yard sale to end all yard sales! Ok...it's just a bunch of stuff on the front lawn, but the extra cash it could make is MUCH needed. So, if you have some free time, stop in and see us if you can!

Books, music, movies, clothing, toys, lamps, sci-fi memorabilia, software, crafts and a whole lot more!

1430 S. 10th
Arcadia, CA 91006

Nearest crosstreets are Duarte and 10th. Easily accessible from the 210 or 605 freeways. Check mapquest for directions http://www.mapquest.com/directions/main.adp?bCTsettings=1

** Crossposted like a MoFo, and no, I'm not sorry one little bit ;) **

Current Mood: hopeful

Hmmm...
Okay so, I've not been very active in LA as a Poly. And I'd like to change that... however every group that I hear of around here is almost exclusively anti-smoking.

Now I can understand not wanting to smoke, I don't want to smoke myself, but I do, and I will, and I'm not likely quitting for a long time. So what's a vice ridden poly to do in LA?

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New community plug.. poly_str8_male
(xposted around)

Every niche deserves its support group. Each person who feels, "I'm strange in the herd, the rest don't understand me." needs to know he isn't alone.

poly_str8_male is a place designed to be a place where similar people can talk about the issues unique to them.

Profile: link
Join: link

Current Mood: pleased

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homeowner? house renter? condo owner? curious/knowledgeable homebody? etc etc etc
new community, hope you enjoy:

la_homeowners

Current Mood: spamtastic, yet minimalistic; please forgive the screen-space

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What's a poly, kinky, pan, leather, genderqueer/genderfuck FTM Leather Daddy to do??
( Something I posted on http://groups.yahoo.com/group/socal_bi_hedonists - When it comes to meeting queer women (and men) who understand, what's a kinky, extraordinarily horny, genderqueer trans/queer Leather Daddy FTM to do??Collapse )

Current Mood: annoyed

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(Cross-posted to my journal, and other places: spread the word!)

California Governor Schwarzenegger is conducting a telephone poll which includes the right for same-gender couples to legally marry in California (for or against). Predictably, right-wingers are flooding the office with calls.
Since we 're trying to pass several marriage equality and domestic partner
bills here, it's a good time to show support on the issue, especially since Arnold is exceptionally conscious of responding to public opinion.

It takes about 24 seconds, not that I timed it or anything. = )

Call (916) 445-2841

On the phone tree, press in order:
- Press #5 for "Current Hot Issues."
- Press #1 for "Same Gender Marriage"
- Press #1 to support gay marriage in California.

Oh - Hi, by the way. Just joined recently, but I'm usually more of a commentor than a poster. Thanks for having me. = )

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Greetings Folks
Friendly Neighborhood Poly Male at your service.

Single and loveing it (kinda) at the moment, so don't be scared. =)

Theatrical Director/Stage Manager/Actor are my primary occupations. (Yah I know I should be in NY but LA is home.)

I'm as much a native as you can be without actually being born in LA Co. Moved into LA Co. at 1 year old.

I'm a Navy Veteran with slight disability, ride a motorcycle, and write when I get the bug to do so.

I've spent more time in Black Rock Desert than any one human should have to.

And I've been Poly since the realization hit me in 97, a single long term triad that ended poorly due to an outside friends drug problem, and several relationships that simply never found another partner while they lasted. (better that they didn't in hindsight.)

Anyway I'm slowly starting to find the romantic within me that had been buried pretty far down in my soul, I recently received the pleasent backhand of "Oh my god she's amazing." realization yesterday while gazing upon an actress at the Company I work with.

Anyway thats as good an intro as I can come up with at the moment. Glad to see this community here, hope it becomes more active than it has been recently.

Current Mood: giddy

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Questionnaire
Hi all! My name is Mina, and I'm hoping you'll be willing to lend me a hand in this brief endeavor. I prepped the following questionnaire in hopes of getting some information from all of you here in LJ-land.

First, a little background: I'm writing a story about a threesome; in this case, a girl and two boys. I want to explore a few different themes in this, namely: loyalty, trust, polyamory... The list goes on and on. So there you have it -- that’s what I’m using this for. Basically, I need some information on both the emotional effects that this relationship would have on these people and how these people would... Well... *have sex*.

Here are some basic q's, feel free to elaborate, or tack on more. If you find *ANYTHING* too personal, you don’t have to answer (obviously ^_~). I’m just looking for information. I will not release your name or any details; this is strictly for background knowledge. Thank you so much for your time!



The responses are not viewable to anyone but me.

THANK YOU!!! If you have any suggestions for changes, I’d love to hear them.

X-posted everywhere.

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Bisexuality is True.

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