Shyte or shineola? Who cares. It will be fun either way. Okay; screw the rules. This is a tree for the yard. Kind of a bill-board for advertising. So here the darn thing is. All nine feet of it.
Kind of a rat’s nest of large gangly trunks. I want to twist and bend them around and make this tree into a wind-swept semi-cascade. This is a Southern Indica azalea variety named Formosa. Has nice dark violet blooms. But these are actually some of the largest azaleas you can find so this plant will have to have “SIZE” to have any sort of scale agreement.
You are right it does sprawl all over the place. Right hand side to the bench; left hand out to the wagon. Four foot square pallets it is sitting on. So maybe 9 feet was selling it short. The base of this is all over the place and about to be worse.
They cross and twist and generally act like they could not make up their mind. I think this plant was originally set aside and something else was put in front of it. Then it put out trying to find the light and this is the result.
One of the problems working with this plant is really not a problem except now. I cannot get a copper wire any closer to the trunk than where I put them. Why? Every time I tried to sink a wire I kept hitting some “plate” beneath the soil. Can only be one hell of a base flair.
Used heavy grounding wire and nylon ties to get the initial positions but will be going back and “lacing” it to the heavy wire as I have started in one of the earlier pictures.
I am going to get my tubing out and work the smaller pieces. This dang thing is scary nasty and there is a lot to get under control here. I’ll post an update in a bit.
Then there is my old friend. This procumbens nana has tried to die on me more times than I can count. But it is time to do just a little bit of work on it. 
This can occur with dropped berries or even some of these on the plant still. Plant seems to be in possession of several multi colored single testicled space phallus.
I swear if it starts speaking I will burn it. Just thought you might be interested in how “odd” some plants can be. The berries you see above fall and strike roots right on the brownish tip ends. Then the plant kind of backs out of the fruit. All very odd. But I still filled a tray with some very coarse organic/coarse silica soil mix just to get their feet under them. Should have no shortage of Podocarpus if even half what I lifted from the hollows in that shipping pallet survive. I admit it I have done my best to watch the water on this all Summer. I am also glad that it has yielded such a plethora of viable seed. Seed? Given that they do sprout on the tree and are really just a trunk waiting to happen, would this be a seed? a seedling? Get back with you on that. I am sure there is a term for this.
And the best tree in the pot doesn’t even have roots on it. You see how the upper part of the trunk goes down then there is a step down in diameter? Now what could cause that? An idiot. Someone left a tag on this plant in the past and it girdled the trunk causing that swelling. Good part? it already has root fibers in the callous tissue and will be very easy to air layer off. Which I intend to do.
Quick shot of the ankles. Not much to work it.
And a little shot of the upper. Don’t know why I should bother. Most of it will be skinned and made into jin as soon as it has a chance to grow me some spurs for character.
After dragging it thru Photoshop to “cut” all the crap out of it. What my plan is for it in both notes and a really really quick mock up.
Hope it will look something like this when I am finished but that will be a couple of years down the road.
Thanks for taking the time to look at this and for being patient with me. Took me a couple of days to finish the mock up.
But I was in a twisted mood myself and decided that I was gonna give this little man a dance for the half line. The tools I am going to use to put this in bondage.
This is as we started. Use a chop stick or bamboo skewer as a spacer as you lace this up. Secure the cord to the wire and work up.
Keeping the skewer between the tree and the wire as you lace it up also allows you to move it up and avoid all the little buds sticking out all over the trunk.
Nothing but a run of half hitches all the was up the trunk. Let the tree rest a bit and allow the cotton to shrink and we should be good to go. I finally ended up with this as the plan.
Only laid over on its side. I wanted a bunch of movement in the trunk because I have always wanted a “strong” semi-cascade. Maybe something like this.
Well bout all I have for now. Later.
These little “stakes” are only 1/4″ in profile diameter. They literally screw into the mix along side the plant’s base. Carefully place your plant along a chosen channel; it is easy to jump groove so watch what you are doing. As you come to each shoot along the vine turn it outwards by twisting the vine and continuing up the groove.
In a week or so I will take a heavier wire; I use 14 guage, and wire the nylon helix as though it were the plant. Then I will put some twists and bends in it. Allow to grow for a month or so then . . . . Well see my prior post.
Time to take the hair out of curlers. I have some nylon strips formed as a double helix. When they were very young I took some of these overly long runners and wound them up the resulting channel. The whole mess what held in place with a wrapping of wire. Now the “twists” have had a chance to set and I am going to see just what I have to work with.As it sat in the beginning.
Part way down and I think I have what I wanted. Yes the curves are too regular to use as they are. But with time, and its smoothing effect, these will become more undulations in the trunks and give it some movement that I could never have wired into it. It will seem to dance rather than move. Good shot of what I am talking about. Not all of the trunk was “curled” either as you can see in the lower left below.
More of the curlers removal and the resulting action in the trunk.
But then it is right back into wire. Some of the “curls” were tightened up in places and others stretched and still others became strong bends in this trunk. Now for the hard part of horticulture; we wait.
Now I only did a few of these in this manner. I find bark that goes merrily up a trunk to be boring. I love it with some twists and bends and movement even in the bark as it goes up the tree. How do you get this? by twisting that trunk while it is still young enough not to give you any grief about it. However this is my first year of playing with these and I really need to know just how they are going to respond to this before I indulge this whimsy.
And finally some quick snaps of some Junipers I am growing for a friend.
Well time to unfurl those other six arms and get off my arse. Too much to do and so little time to even get started.
I can guarantee you are going to see more about these. Hint: these pics are from back as they were ripening. What do ripe seed do?
Just about all the time I have right now. Sorry.
I messed with these for a while on the 25th of July but the following day I had had all I could take. 26 July: I am fed up with this POS boxwood. It has been sitting around for a couple of years. Just been letting the roots chill and the top run rampant. This is the tree as it sat that morning.
Yep; even I screw up sometimes and break a tool. Can’t remember why this piece was placed in this pot for though.
As you can see this tree has plenty to recommend it from the soil to the first branch. But then? It has every thing to make it a big piece of nothing. Multiple trunk breaks, leggy runs, bent in just the wrong way at the wrong place; you name it, it has it all and then some. Now I am quite sure that if I did this to someone’s tree they would stroke. But in this case all I can do is try to take advantage of the lower trunk and grow everything else back from scratch. It will leave some ugly cuts but then again lets see a couple more years down the road. But for now? Cut that bitch!
This had to start along some sort of coherent path. Gave just the top couple of inches of soil a gentle rake out. No fine root work and nothing in the lower remainder of the root ball. This leaves about a third of the original completely intact.
What a mess. What did I ever see in this plant? Oh yea; the bottom. Well here goes.The mess as it sat.
Immediately after the big haircut. Still a lot of this tree will leave but for right now I want to make certain that I have enough foliage for the tree to survive. The next thing is time. Wait for it to again grow out some, all the while selecting back buds, then cut the rest of the trash from this little child.
Heat has been unbearable here. Could not have gotten anything done without my survival cups. A large glass of iced coffee and a short cup of butter pecan ice cream; one cup cuts the heat the other cuts the sweet.
adventuresinmyoldgarden 
