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Mar. 3rd, 2022 08:42 pm![[personal profile]](/%20https://www.npmjs.com/package/ocr-https-www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
delleI'm in a mood.
Out of the blue, Himself says "if [evil former employer] would hire you, would you apply?"
I say, given the reason i was fired, I'm on a no-rehire list
He says "don't discount yourself, they're desperate for employees"
so now I'm in a funk. I loved my job at [evil former employer]. I was good at my job, I loved the job (until I got the Toxic Manager) and I really thought I would end my working life there. I wanted to work there until I retired, I never wanted to job search again.
So this has put me in a funk. Kicking myself for doing what I did (which lead to being fired), wishing beyond wishing I had kept my stupid mouth shut, kept my head down and just.... shut the fuck up, yeah?
So I've been thinking about it. And it turns out he did exactly what I was considering asking him to do - he asked his manager (a good guy, as managers go; I knew him somewhat) to put feelers out to see if [evil former employer] would be open to rehiring me.
I'm ~~ok~~ at my current job - there are some very nice things about it and somedays I feel really appreciated - but the money is much better at {evil former employer] + frankly it's more 'professional' and I really felt/feel like I was making a difference for people.
This is probably all sound and fury, I sincerely think they won't even consider me.
so.
Then I can continue to stew about what an idiot I was.
Later: still stewing, still in a mood. but it occurs to me, even if lightening strikes, I would not retain my prior seniority. which means shitty shifts, working holidays. I'm not willing to give up my choir a 2nd time. Life is too short, and I just went back after 2 yrs of covid. Last time [evil employer] put me on a 11:30-8 shift and I had to give up choir for 2 yrs. not doing that again.
Out of the blue, Himself says "if [evil former employer] would hire you, would you apply?"
I say, given the reason i was fired, I'm on a no-rehire list
He says "don't discount yourself, they're desperate for employees"
so now I'm in a funk. I loved my job at [evil former employer]. I was good at my job, I loved the job (until I got the Toxic Manager) and I really thought I would end my working life there. I wanted to work there until I retired, I never wanted to job search again.
So this has put me in a funk. Kicking myself for doing what I did (which lead to being fired), wishing beyond wishing I had kept my stupid mouth shut, kept my head down and just.... shut the fuck up, yeah?
So I've been thinking about it. And it turns out he did exactly what I was considering asking him to do - he asked his manager (a good guy, as managers go; I knew him somewhat) to put feelers out to see if [evil former employer] would be open to rehiring me.
I'm ~~ok~~ at my current job - there are some very nice things about it and somedays I feel really appreciated - but the money is much better at {evil former employer] + frankly it's more 'professional' and I really felt/feel like I was making a difference for people.
This is probably all sound and fury, I sincerely think they won't even consider me.
so.
Then I can continue to stew about what an idiot I was.
Later: still stewing, still in a mood. but it occurs to me, even if lightening strikes, I would not retain my prior seniority. which means shitty shifts, working holidays. I'm not willing to give up my choir a 2nd time. Life is too short, and I just went back after 2 yrs of covid. Last time [evil employer] put me on a 11:30-8 shift and I had to give up choir for 2 yrs. not doing that again.
